today i made a meal that everyone loved... it was paella with lots of veggies and chicken...
with the help of Big T we won everyone over...
i'm actually proud because a lot of my other meals have been just ok...
i think Big T helped me out a lot... she kept on praising me and telling me that i was making the best meal ever...
i was thinking after the meal about what i do good and the things i give up on...
usually it takes the approval of others for me to want to excel in something...
it's always been like that... i crave other's opinions... and i usually let it affect me...
if people tell me how great i'm doing with something i end up doing really great at it...
why do i have to be like this?
why can't my approval be the only one that counts?
having someone pat you on the back is nice but they wont be there all the time...
i need to find my own passion for life...
i need to stop living for others...
what makes me happy?
what?
i just need to find out what that is... and forget what everyone says...
if people tell me i'm doing wrong... i can't let that stop me... and i can't crave for approval because it wont always be there...
yeah
kiwi